fine lines and family things
by TappinCastlefan
Summary: She has no clue as to where the line is and if she's crossed it yet or if she should, or if she can even bring herself to. Post-ep for 6.06.


**Not sure what I was thinking when I started this but I'm pretty sure it turned out to be something completely different. Post-ep for 6.06.**

**Un-edited or beta'ed. **

* * *

**fine lines and family things**

* * *

After dealing with paperwork and finishing their case she does make it over to the loft. One quick change at her place, swapping her suit for something more casual…a little more, _cheer up, Castle_, and she's letting herself in.

The loft is quiet, only quiet murmurs of the television in his office. Following the slight noise does her no good – the office is empty, his bedroom is empty, where the hell did he go, she thinks. She tries upstairs. Not in Alexis' room…so where?

The roof. She remembers the roof, and how he took her up there one night early on in their relationship, when she was stressed out about a case.

Quickly, she climbs the stairs, forgoing the elevator in a need to get to him as soon as possible, and sure enough, there he is, lounging back in a chair staring off into the New York night.

"Hey," she whispers as she comes up behind him, letting one hand snake down his chest while the other rested on his shoulder. A kiss to his cheek, "you okay?"

"She doesn't want to see me. Or talk to me. She's my little girl, Kate and she doesn't want to have anything to do with me."

She hadn't thought it possible but he sounds more devastated than ever before. Tyson, Scott Dunn, not even Alexis' kidnapping left him so broken. Her heart hurts.

"It'll be okay," she murmurs into his ear. "It's just for a little while, you two will fix this."

"How can you be so sure?" He asks.

With a sigh Kate moves to the chair next to him, turns it to face him and sits. "Because I know you, Castle," she takes his hand, cradles it between her own. "And because I know Alexis. Maybe not as well as I would like to, but I do know her. She's so smart, Castle. She's strong and passionate, and do you know why?"

"Hmm?"

"Because you raised her that way."

"She hates me, Kate. What good is raising her right if I can't be there to see her fly?"

She waits a beat, trying to figure out what could have happened between her fiancé and his daughter for things to be this bad. She knew he wasn't too keen on Pi, but this was…this was uncharted territory. "What happened?"

"Went to her apartment," she doesn't miss the bitter clip of his words, "we talked, sort of."

"Okay…what did you talk about?"

"Pi…me, not wanting her to be happy, you-"

"Me?"

Finally he looks up and met her eyes, "I never told her about us. About me proposing."

"You…what?"

"I know, I know I should have told her. I probably should have told her before I even came to meet you, but I was just so set on seeing you that I-"

"Rick, what do you mean you never told her?"

"My mother told her. I never told her we were engaged myself. I don't know how I didn't," he sighed, "but I didn't, and….I hurt her."

"And that's why she's so upset?"

"No. Yes, partly, I think. She thinks I don't 'accept' Pi, and she's right."

She hums her agreement. She loves the man, supports him, but she's not going to let him off the hook for his behavior either. Because she was once a young girl in love and knows how Alexis feels.

"I have to do it for her, but I don't know how. He counts bees for a living. _Bees_. What the hell kind of job is that?"

"A very important one when you consider how important they are to pollination and the world's fruit and vegetable supply."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously."

"How do you even know that?"

She chuckles. "It's kind of a big deal in the world of environmental news right now, Castle."

"Really?"

"Really. Castle, this is why Alexis is so upset. You're not even giving him the benefit of the doubt. Have you stopped and just _noticed_ him?" He stares at her. "He's actually pretty bright. The two of them have _intelligent_ conversations. They talk about world issues, social issues, important topics. The other day he was trying to talk to me about the societal ramifications of police action in South America and gave so many different arguments that I was dizzy."

"So, he's not just some random guy she found on a banana plantation and decided to bring home as a souvenir?"

She glares at him, not impressed with his word choice. "No," she reaffirms, "he's not. But you know what's more important?"

"Hmm?" He growls.

"He makes her happy," she pleads with him.

"That's what she said."

Kate can't help it, she smiles. "At least think about giving him a chance, alright?" She stands, leans over to kiss his forehead, "I'm going to go get cleaned up. Don't stay out here too long?"

She hears his mumbled answer as she heads back for the stairs, still not convinced that she's anwhere near helpful.

* * *

It's late. Far too late for her to be awake, but she has the next day off so she figures, why not?

She finds herself at the counter with a mug of tea while he sleeps. He finally drifted off just barely an hour ago and she hopes that her moving won't disturb him. Because even though he's out, he's been tossing and turning and isn't at all restful.

She can feel the ceramic of the mug getting cooler and cooler, but she isn't getting anywhere close to being able to go back to bed. Lost in thoughts of Alexis and Pi she completely misses the click of the door and Martha's heels crossing the hardwood floors.

"Can't sleep, Darling?"

"Hm?" She jumps. "No," she feigns a laugh, "not really happening tonight. Long night?"

"Some of my students wanted to work late on some scenery and I decided to keep them company. Nothing crazy, I promise," she laughs.

"Oh," she stutters, nervously, "I wasn't worried."

"So," Martha settles herself against the opposite counter, "what has you up and out here instead of curled up in bed with my son?"

"It's nothing. Just one of those nights, I suppose."

"Nonsense, Katherine. You were lost in your head when I came in, don't think I can't tell that something's wrong. A mother knows these things."

Her fingers tap nervously against the outside of the mug. "Castle's not handling this thing with Alexis well, and we talked earlier, but…"

"He's still fighting it?"

"Yeah," she sighs. "I don't know how to help him with this one."

"Just be there for him, Darling." Martha soothes. She's looking over with kind eyes that she doesn't feel she deserves. "Whether or not we like it, all of us," she nods, implying all three of the adults in the loft, "Alexis is at the age where she needs to make her own decisions. She doesn't need us as much anymore," she sighs, "and we have to get used to it."

Kate knows that the girl's recent life choices weigh heavily on her grandmother as well. It's obvious.

"She'll always need you Martha," Kate answers. "Trust me," she sighs, thinking of her mother, "she's always going to need you."

The older woman looks up, her eyes soft and loving. "You know, with a boy this is easier. Richard was independent for most of his life thanks to our lifestyle. Letting him go was never easy - watching your child go his own way just isn't - but we had been used to it by the time he found his own place and his own life. It's different with Alexis."

Kate nods.

"But we have to let her have her own life, don't we? Richard is just going to have to learn to live with it."

"It's tough. I know how she feels, but at the same time she has me questioning everything I've ever done. Logically, I know that this will get better, they'll figure it out eventually, but it's killing him," she nods toward the bedroom where her writer is desperately trying to _be okay_.

Martha shrugs, pushing off the counter and moving towards the stairs. "Maybe that would be good for her to know," she muses, pausing to squeeze Kate's hand on her walk past, "Get some sleep, Katherine. We'll figure something out in the morning."

She lets the woman leave without another word, but her mind is still running a mile a minute. She listens as Martha runs the faucet in the bathroom, tiptoes around getting ready for bed, wondering what the hell she is going to do. She has no clue as to where the line is and if she's crossed it yet or if she should, or if she can even bring herself to.

* * *

Somehow, all of Castle's brooding and her own thinking has led her here. She's standing in front of Alexis and Pi's apartment trying not to shake with nerves because really, she knows, she probably shouldn't be here.

But she can't help thinking that she has to do something, because she knows that they're all in pain. They're all about to be family and she doesn't want to be sitting on the sidelines waiting for Castle to tag her in.

She brings her hand to knock before she can turn around. There's only silence. Maybe they're not home? Oh god, she pauses, what if Pi's the only one home? What will she say to him?

"Beckett?"

She spins to find Alexis coming out of the elevator, messenger bag hanging off of one shoulder, keys perched in her fingertips and a look of total shock on her face. "Hey."

"What're you doing here?" Alexis questions as she walks up to unlock the door.

"I was wondering if you had a few minutes?" She thinks she can hear the gears turning in the girl's head as she fiddles with the sticky lock.

"Yeah, just let me put my stuff down."

"Sure," she whispers, quietly observing the complicated jiggling of Alexis's key in the lock, the way she shoves her body against the door to push it open.

"Old door?"

"Yeah," Alexis answers, "It's fine though." She's already on the defensive. Not exactly ideal, Kate thinks as she bites back the _'I didn't say it wasn't'_ on the tip of her tongue.

She follows Alexis into the apartment without another word, taking in the small space. It's not bad, definitely worn in, but when was that a bad thing? They've given it character with the strings of lights and borderline-hipster artwork on the wall. Her eyes catch on a small bookshelf in the corner, overloaded with novels and textbooks. She notices some of Castle's books on the shelves and finds herself unexpectedly relieved at the sight.

"I don't mean to sound rude, but, what exactly do you want?"

When she looks back at Alexis she's standing in the middle of the room with her arms crossed. Staring her down.

Great.

"Like I said, do you have a few minutes? To talk?"

Alexis shrugs a shoulder. "Did Dad send you here?"

"No. He doesn't know I'm here."

She thinks that for a split second Alexis looks surprised. Probably not. Maybe.

"Okay…"

"Look, I'm not even really sure what I wanted to ask you, or tell you or whatever. But," she pauses, looks up, collecting the few strains of points she had when she came in, "I want you to know I'm here, okay? For you."

"Alright." She looks eager to get her out of the apartment – her home. But doesn't say anything more than the one word.

"You don't need a mother Alexis – you have one already, and honestly," she laughs, "I have no idea how the hell to be one. I know that there's really not much between us, and you certainly have no reason to want to trust me," she thinks of all the times the girl has been witness to her father in danger, "but, I am here if you just need someone else to talk to about things."

Alexis rolls her eyes.

"I get that things are rough between us, but you don't need to give me an attitude – oh god, now I sound like my mother." She stops herself, "Fine, I'm sorry for bothering you, I'll just go-"

She's almost at the door when Alexis speaks up again, "Dad really didn't ask you to come?"

Kate turns in the foyer, tucks her own arms around her torso and shakes her head no, "No, he really didn't. You told him you wanted some space and he's trying to give it to you."

Alexis takes a shaky breath, and sits down at the kitchen table.

What was she supposed to do now?

"He feels pretty awful, Alexis. You should know that."

"He should feel awful. He's been a jerk."

"I know." Kate agrees, startled by the fact that she's somehow made her way to the chair next to the girl. "He knows. Alexis, I've been where you are. You want to have your own life and make your own decisions because, yeah, you're kind of an adult."

"I am."

"Almost. You're almost an adult. You're nineteen, not twenty-one. You're not there yet. But you're allowed to feel the way you're feeling, and so is your dad."

"I didn't want to tell him before I decided because I knew he wasn't going to be okay with it," her voice is still, even and unwavering. "But I had to do something for me."

"I know," Kate whispers. "Honestly I think you've made some good decisions. It's a safe building, if a little on the aged side, and Pi's not the worst person in the world."

Alexis huffs, "Tell that to Dad."

"I did."

Alexis looks up, surprised.

"He knows. But you should have told him you were thinking about moving in with him and you absolutely should have told him you were bringing him home in the first place."

"He didn't," she argues. "He never told me about you when you got together a year ago and he never told me he wanted to propose. He never even told me that he did."

"Yeah," Kate sighs, her head falls. "I didn't know that until he told me last night, and I'm sorry. But it's not an excuse, you know that right?"

The girl doesn't answer.

"That's something you need to talk to him about. And if you want him to treat you like an adult you need to act like it, not shut him out completely. I said that I get where you're coming from, right?" She nods. "Well, I also get where your dad's coming from, and your Gram. I'm in the world's most awkward position here, Alexis. I can tell you all about how worried and upset they are, but I don't want you to feel completely guilty because you're not the only one at fault, and I know how shitty it feels on your end.

"I was twenty." She starts without being asked. "First time I moved in with a guy my dad threatened to kill him. He didn't think it was a good idea, and he thought I'd either get killed or end up pregnant."

"But you didn't."

"No. And the guy I was living with is still a pretty good friend of mine. But things can get messy and my dad didn't hesitate with the slew of 'I told you so's' every time something was wrong."

"Just because your dad was right then, doesn't mean that mine is now."

"No, it doesn't."

"But…I guess I could let him give us a real couch."

She nods. "Talk to him okay? Really talk to him and give him a chance to hear you out and answer and have his opinions. He loves you more than anything Alexis. I wouldn't be here if I didn't think you both deserved to figure this out."

"Okay," Alexis caves, "I still want some time…but I'll think about it."

"Okay," Kate nods, smiling just barely. She gets up from the table and heads for the door. "He'll be there when you call. I promise."

Alexis pinches her lips together, nods, "I know. And…thanks, I guess."

"I told you, I'm here. I may not be great at this, but I won't lie to you."

She looks up just before she can leave, "I appreciate it."

Kate lets herself out of the apartment, leans back against the wall of the elevator as soon as the doors close. She lets out a long breath, amazed that she survived the conversation without sounding like an idiot or completely alienating her fiancé's daughter. It wasn't perfect – definitely not the speech she would have gotten in that situation, from either of her parents, but she can't help but be just a little bit proud of herself.

They'll figure the family thing out eventually. All of them.

Maybe even Pi.


End file.
